Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
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Wednesday, March 29, 2006Anyone wants to be a GP rep? i'll gladly give up my place. feel like a rather incompetant GP rep cause i just can't seem to get pple to hand up their work on time; and when tt happens, the teacher is unhappy, and then those pple get it from him, but i mean being the rep, u obviously wouldn't want ur classmates to get scolded and all rite so ya.. and a bulk load more reasons. so anyone wants to take over? sigh.BAD day today. no good at all. well, i guess yesterday was worse. or maybe not. maybe both is as bad. kinda teared in class this morning. not due to any relationship problems or anything... its just family stuff lar. but u know, its the family stuff tt gets u the most. so ah well. and i think stress... really gets pple to behave totally wierdly. ah well... guess everyone's really stressed but i'm sure we'll all pull through if we keep telling ourselves we can make it. and with positive effects of everyone... we WILL pull through. Just have the faith ya... hm... gonna play badminton with mei yi against limpy 2mr... hopefull the resutls aren't as bad as it was in the past. =X i really don't need something else to screw up my screwed up life. ah well... as of now, i will live up to my "FULL TIME NERD" position. =) = ok, i kinda can't take it anymore. awkwardness is really not my cup of tea and i just dunno how to tell u lar ok. whatever i'm going to say here, whether you belive or not, its really up to u. If the reason for ur hostility was really because i mislead u when i said i wouldn't fall for him then here's my explnation. During tt time, i REALLY had NO idea this kinda thing would happen ok.. and at tt time i was trying to matchmake him with my ex school-mate, so logically of course i would say no. get it? and at tt time, i really never intended to get into any form of relationships whatsoever, u can ask my besties to verify tt. yup. and since i never had any experience with guys rite, obviously i wouldn't know tt saying "no" would lead to this kinda thing lar. so ya. explanation done. = Wednesday, March 15, 2006-Untitled-I always believed human beings had a conscience, deep down somewhere. I was sure they had it too. But i was wrong. They backstabbed; they gossiped; they laughed about turning their backs on others, they derive pleasure from outcasting people. My thoughts start to waver, I don't know what's going on, I don't know their reasons, but i can't phantom why they can't talk things out, I can't comprehand why they just won't give people a chance, I can't believe their superficiality . Is talking things out so difficult? Aren't friends suppose to help each other? What happened to the times of genuine care? For all I know, he treated you as someone true. Just what went wrong? What happened to seeing the good in others? Was that all a myth? Can it not happen now, here in the real world? Finding out felt like someone slapped me hard in the face, it felt horrid. Ever felt it? My eyes are wet from thinking about it, Something i once so strongly believed was being whacked away. I don't really know who to trust anymore. That kind of feeling is indescribable, it's so heart wrenching you can't stop tearing. It takes a lot of energy to be strong, to make others believe you're ok when you aren't, because you know you don't want them to worry. It's tiring. Exhausting. I wonder for how long more i can hold. But i'm sure i can pull through cause i've got friends whom i can really lean on, and trust, and who'll be there no matter what. =) -My special sweet- Here, have a special sweet. At the beginning, everything was sweet. I smiled. In fact, it was the sweetest thing i ever tasted in my whole entire life. At that moment, Life couldn't seem any better. As time past, things ain't so sweet any more. It starts to turn sour, then bitter, then it got really unbearable. Then i thought, should i just spit it out? Or should i'd just bear with it, and maybe it'd be sweet again. It was tough, on one hand, i was afraid i'd be disappointed, and i didn't want that, but then, i didn't want to give up, i wanted to trust this friend who gave me sweet. My tongue's hurting. He seems oblivious. He just smiles. My thoughts get even wilder, what if he's trying to make a fool out of me? What if all he said bout this special sweet was fake? But i decided... i'd hold it. Its hard to give someone your faith totally. Are you willing to give it away? I'm not sure. Someday, I guess i'll learn how. Proudly done by: CARLENE!!! =) Sunday, March 05, 2006hello everybirdie!!! haha... finally back to blog something. been kinda busy over the past week with numerous tests so on and so forth, esp physics!!! i kinda spent a lot of time on that but it didn't seem to be of much use so ah wells.. i can only hope for the best.was talking the scruff that day, and i realise 1 mistake i made. i mean i actually kinda gave false hopes without even knowing it and maybe that's why things ended up like that. i didn't know saying "i wouldn't like so and so" would kinda give false hopes to someone else. sheesh. how dumb can i get. ya, and we were kinda reminicing the past and i kinda regret some things i did. but then, why regret when it was already done rite? so ya, guess i'll take action to clear things up soon. =) But first... i gotta get my studies straightened out. Whilst in every other college, the number of pupils scoring 3 A's increase rapidly, it seems the opposite for tpjc. Heard from my GP tutor that 70 over % pupils in RJC got 3As and above(this means about 600 pupils). Just imagine how hard it would be to get into a course in the uni of your choice with all these smarty pants around(no offence of course) but ya!! argh!!! oh ya, something happy i'd like to announce. i got B4 for chi!!! no more chi!!!(although its important) BUT... *grinz* yup... That day, i caught a falling leaf by accident and i was really happy. cos i heard from minfeng that making a wish upon a falling leaf makes that wish come true... and i wished... that everyone scores well for A levels. let's hope this wish come true... =) so let's all start working hard now and give ourselves a good future ahead. =) take care pple!! |